Christmas is for people who admit to being too needy.

Recently, a friend asked me what I wanted for Christmas. This was my very first response, just to talk to you.

Friendship with this person has been one of the riches blessings in my life. I realize that not a lot of people have such a friendship like ours—if even a close friend at all. It isn’t about the material giving that makes up a truly close friendship. Life and time has limited our talking to one another as often as we once did. The friendship is still there but the time spent actually talking on the phone has been far less lately. 

It's sitting down together over a meal, a cup of coffee late at night and just sharing things. I’ve had times like this with this one friend and one other. These two people I consider two of my closes friends and my mind always goes back to those times. Remembering helping one of these friends throughout the Christmas holiday, baking with her, wrapping gifts, then stopping to eat a burger and coffee when we got done. These are the things I miss the most. With the other friend as well. Not doing the same things but that time spent talking, praying, and believing for God to move in our lives—these are what I would ask for.

I realized something about myself recently. I’ve always tried to be honest about who I am. Especially, since being a Christian. From the very beginning of my walk with the Lord I’ve stood on this scripture. You shall know the truth and the truth will set you free. It isn’t always easy to be truthful about who we are, it takes a lot of soul searching.

Lately, the world is in a real mess. It seems that another scripture is a truth. Calling good evil and evil good. Completely backwards. Sometimes you just have to sit back and wonder what in the world are people thinking. How do they ever come to such conclusions?

Examining my own life today and being asked what I really want for Christmas from this person, I reached deep inside and told them the truth. First, I admitted this truth to myself.

A little backstory. Recently I heard someone say that we come into this world wanting two things. Actually, a part of every human being whether they admit to it or not—wanting to know God and needing the closeness of another human being. Boy, does this ever describe me.

I’m constantly seeking after that closeness with knowing God. Knowing His love and wanting to live with an awareness of His presence in my life every day. Always seeking more of Him. Then in my interaction with another person. Here is where my total surrendering of the truth about myself came this morning.

I am an extremely needy person. I have been from my birth. I’ve known it but not to the degree that I’m now willing to admit it openly. All my life I have searched for that one true intimate relationship. It’s a rare illusive thing. I’m sure I’m not the only one chasing after it. I’ve pretty much given up on the hope of finding it at this time in my life. Seventy-five years and I think it’s time to let it go.

My confession this morning was realizing that being such a needy person means that I don’t think there really is anyone who could have ever filled that place in me but God. After all, we are all needy in some aspects, so asking another person who is broken themselves to fill our neediness is absurd. I think we are a lot of half people walking around looking for that other half of ourselves.

Christmas is such a hard time for many of us. It brings all those emotions to the surface that I think we keep under control all the other time. But I would be amiss if I didn't also say that I am certainly not as big a mess at Christmas that I have been in my life years ago. Even the ads this time of year prompted my emotions. Seeing families gather around cozy kitchen settings, a family dinner table or friends knocking at their door. There’s one this year that I am sure will be sending people looking for the box of Kleenex.

It’s a woman with dementia and the grandchild takes her out in an old truck that has been tucked away in a barn which brings back memories she had otherwise lost. I won’t give it all away, but what it provokes is sheer a heartstring tugging moment. I’m positive that it will touch a lot of people. We really don’t know sometimes what other people are actually going through.

My finally coming to accept the fact that my extreme neediness can and will only be filled by God gives me a much needed complete peace this Christmas. Just knowing that I DO have someone that loves me unconditionally no matter what, can’t be bought and wrapped in a package with a bow on top. Like a lot of people that think that they are the only one who feels a certain way, has to know they can’t be the only one.

So, if you are struggling again this Christmas looking for that fleeting vision of finding all that you need in another individual I have good news for you. There is Someone who can love you more than any other person in the world—God.

That is what Christmas is really all about. Not what the world has made it out to be. If you want to really have a Christmas experience, take a minute to slow down, steal away in your mind and really look at that manger birth scene. Ask yourself what really was happening in that moment. Who was Mary and Joseph and what were their lives about to do for all of humanity. They were just two young people chosen by God to be the instruments of his coming in human form as Jesus.

I’m sure at some time you might have heard the word—Emmanuel. It means God with us. He came into this world to do just that—be with each and every one of us who will recognize Him in the birth of Jesus Christ. It takes faith. It takes wanting to admit to needing God. That life is hard and when we look anywhere else for something or someone to fill that need in our lives we come away still in need. I think the truth that really hit me hard in my being honest is in the word—reciprocate. Often times this is what is missing with human relationships. Expecting that other person to meet our expectations in the same way that we give to them. This is rare, extremely rare, and rarely does it ever happen.

I hope with all my heart if even one person is led here this Christmas season looking for something to fill that need in themselves I will have given them Good News. I’d like to offer you a place to look for that rare and almost impossible relationship if like me, you find yourself able to admit to being needy.

There is someone looking for you too. Someone who can be everything to you that you ever wanted and need. And it can happen so easily with just one simple prayer of admitting that He is Lord and asking for forgiveness and asking Him to come into your life. This person is—Jesus. Please take time to really look into the meaning of Christmas this year, you won’t be disappointed. I know that its hard to believe that its possible for the deepest part of you to ever find what you are searching for, but it's possible. The only way that it is possible is through God's precious gift of Himself. 

I bless you.

Merry Christmas